Letter to AliRose

I was very pleased to open my email this morning and find this email from a guy we will call "Inappropriate Hugger." Thank you, IH, for your DeVotchKa post. Keep em coming!

Hey –

I know there was a request to send thoughts about the show to My Music at Fox, but since I haven't hugged Fox yet I don't feel comfortable sharing my feelings with it/him/her. Anyways, I did get to the show early because I like being close, but not too close. Strangely that is the same approach I have with women... Anyways, the first act doesn't need commenting, they won a contest which is nice for them, not so nice for me. Second act, Basia, well she was adorable, has decent strange presence and was adorable. Did I say she was adorable? Well, musically the last song or two where the energy was picked up was considerably better than the direction the set was going. Maybe I need to listen to her stuff some more, but she was not nearly as good as My Brightest Diamond (last time's opening act). Before getting to the main act some crowd observations, I saw a lot of couples... I mean A LOT. Next down I would say packs of wild girls or gyrls or grls, usually in packs of 4. Not sure what the significance of that was... And finally, my group, sad looking single guys, looking for a taste of happiness or more sadness in strings and accordion music. I must say for a portion of the main act I felt like I was at the State Fair playing "Whack a Mole". Except in this case it was "Whack a Pot Head Hippy Gyrl." You see there were four ladies in front of me that would scrunch do to take a hit of a joint and pass it to the next who would in turn do the same thing. Not sure if they thought that was more discreet or not. The show itself did not feel as energetic as the last two I have been two. I don't know if it was the new tuba sans Christmas lights or something else. I will admit that I do love "Queen of the Surface Streets" and "How It Ends" and am not apologetic for that. I have most of their releases with the exception of the soundtrack and I enjoy it all, but there is something about those songs. As for the Slavic Sisters, that is what it is. Anyways, I hope you had a good time at the show. I did not seek you out for fear of another hugging episode. I know you sought treatment, but it could make for an uncomfortable situation for those attending the show with you.

Tell your mother you love her,
Inappropriate hugger.

Dr. G goes to DeVotchKa

Crowd Breakdown

• Dirty Hippies: 60% Who needs drugs when you can hear an accordion!
• Lesbians: 30% Ladies, just because you bought the band’s t-shirt, doesn’t mean you have to put it on directly
• Moms in Clogs: 5% Holla!
• Band and Entourage: 4%
• Swingers: 1% A small but visible minority (P.S. Seriously? Must all of you make out with all of you directly in front of me?)

Miscellaneous Data

• Aroma: A Light Roast of Patchouli and Body Odor
• Dance Move: Tie! The evening’s most popular move was split between Shark-Attack-Victim-Trying-to-Keep-Afloat (think no-armed rocking) with Asian-Styled Female Wrist/Hand Movement (see image)

What Gets this Crowd Off

1. Ladies who play big horns
2. The word “Minneapolis”
3. Songs they’ve already heard. Either on the Current or in their Slovak dreams.

Hypothetical Audience Situation

If the boy audience members were pitted against the girl audience members in an all-out bar brawl, who would win?
Good question. Initially I would say the women could take the fight without losing a single headscarf. However, after further audience investigation, I would have to say that the fight would come down to whichever sex could keep their artsy glasses on long enough to see their opponent.

Community Ed Class Recommendation

If you wanted to make a splash at future DeVotchKa shows, may I recommend taking “Belly-Dancing Your Way to Spiritual and Physical Fitness.” Southwest High School Gym, M-W, evenings.